The big move and the stress factor

cup of tea stress

Whether you’re moving home due to one of the three D’s (Divorce, Death or Debt) – or even if it’s by choice and you’re excited about upscaling to a new life and new property – whatever the reason it’s a well known fact that moving is considered as one of the major life stressors.

Such a change often creates a mixing pot of emotions that can put you in a state of fear and uncertainty or even anger, depending on the situation. Either way, it’s not unusual for people’s emotions to swing from one extreme to another. Even when things are looking good, new possibilities may feel liberating but also risky.

Respecting and managing your emotions are the keys to managing a successful move.

You are likely to experience anxiety, fear, loss, regret, sadness, guilt, then perhaps on the same day excitement, happiness, joy and wellbeing.

It’s certainly very taxing on your energy levels and if you throw current life factors into the equation such as children, work and relationships, expect to feel uber tense!

Apart from the practicalities of moving such as packing, de-cluttering, organizing and expense, there are our emotions to deal with too, which can feel overwhelming and never ending.

During my own move from London to Northumberland I experienced all of the above emotions and more… As such, here are some tips to make the move run more smoothly and help you keep your sanity.

Acknowledge your loss in a constructive way.

Don’t sensor your emotions, let them be. Start by looking back on all the good memories and the bad. Moving can stir up all sorts of emotions that you have perhaps never acknowledged and they can take you by surprise.

I made a picture book of friends and places from my previous neighbourhood. This signified my feeling of loss in a constructive way and I was able to appreciate all the good times and friendships forged and remember them in an instant by looking through my little book.

I left some empty pages and wrote ‘new friends’ at the top to give me a sense of looking forward to building new relationships.

Be the master of your stress.

Find practical ways to release stress by relaxing in the bath, getting to that yoga class you never quite make, walking along the beach or simply reading a book. Finding time for yourself is essential – even though you have a million and one things to do for the move you need to replenish energy levels on a daily basis. Remember Health is the ultimate Wealth.

Get Connected.

Surround yourself with positive support whether that’s joining a  group, finding a counselor or just spending time with good friends. It’s imperative not to isolate yourself, talking through your fears and sharing your excitement will help you process what you are feeling and may also help your friends and family manage their feelings of loss concerning your move too.

Set yourself a new goal.

As you pack up your old life think of something to do with your new life such as an activity or event to look forward to, perhaps a house warming or getting some dates in the diary for friends to visit after you have settled in. It might be finding a new pastime, buying some pretty things for your new house, or booking a local restaurant for dinner or even a well deserved spa day. It can be anything that helps you look to the future with excitement and anticipation.

Bright Horizons.

Look to the future, remember your old life is part of who you are, it’s a cliché but life is really a journey and this move is another chapter in your life. Imagine yourself smiling, relaxed, content and calm as you get to know your new house and neighbourhood.

Finally, visualize your first Christmas or BBQ and smile and remember that change is good once we get over our fear, and often the flip side of fear is excitement.

You will survive and perhaps even thrive!

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